Upper Peninsula Trip {Vacation 2015}

Family expedition to DeTour Village and Drummond Island.

Summer Sunset

Went to the lake to watch the sun set with my roommate the other night. It was beautiful and lovely, and all things serene. Plus, we got to go on a fun walk through the woods. 

Roomie and me.

Think Like Elisabeth -- My Tribute to Elisabeth Elliot

This morning I was reading articles by Josh Harris and John Piper, both about the life and legacy of Elisabeth Elliot. I have admired Elisabeth since the age of 17 when I first read Quest for Love: True stories of Passion and Purity. I admire her frank, blunt, no-nonsense faith. It's trustworthy. I've never had to take her words with a grain of salt, as I usually do with most Christian writers. Today, I find few authors who embrace the Word wholeheartedly. Few are willing to be that "radical," I suppose. But Elisabeth's stance on, well, everything was just biblical. No frills. She loved the Word because it was from God and she had determined at young age to abandon all sense of self to God. It made me strive to do the same. 

I started journaling about something unrelated this afternoon. I was thinking about the so-called controversial idea of following our hearts. In the Christian world those words are taboo because the Bible tells us how deceitful the heart can be, which is why we must guard it. But, in the last year I have heard three different grown Christians specifically instruct me to follow my heart, one of whom was my dad, of all people. 

Needless to say, I've been thinking about the concept in a different light. 

I started journaling about it today, then. As I wrote, something overtook me and the words I wrote were no longer my own. They were something like Elisabeth's. 

* * * 

Follow The Heart of God—Yours

It is a safe thing to follow a heart whose compass points toward Heaven. Whose path has already been paved and beaten down by the weary feet of Jesus. The owner of such a heart has surrendered body, soul, and mind to Jesus such that even their heart no longer technically belongs to them. Their path is no longer their own. In choosing, then, to follow their heart, they find their heart is assured and at peace. Jesus, who has thus taken full ownership of their heart, has nudged them forward; he has turned both their heart and feet, and whispered, “Come. Follow me.”

I suppose the next decision would be to determine if you are the owner of such a heart. “How can I be certain I’m following Jesus when I’m following my heart?” It is a good, reasonable question to ask. It is frighteningly too easy to hear the devil’s voice and feel the devil’s “peace.” It might very well be easier to hear from the Enemy than it is to hear from the Advocate until your heart has been completely surrendered to Jesus. This “Devil’s peace” speaks to your flesh, putting it at ease whilst ignoring the prickling discomfort in your spirit. When discerning the “peace” of either the flesh or the spirit, speak aloud whatever the voice you hear is saying. Repeat the whisper. Does your family or trusted advisor sense a spiritual prickle? More so, do you sense a spiritual prickle? That creepy crawl up your conscience posing the opposite question—Is this truly God? That prick along your spiritual spine is a symptom. If you want to scratch at it, pay careful attention to it. It should not be there.

The only place on your being which should ever prickle with discomfort is your flesh. It shouldn’t be at rest with the act of laying down your life, choosing to follow God. Not at first, anyway. Your flesh wants only to serve itself. But the heart owned by God will move toward the narrow gate to Heaven. Even if your flesh burns with fiery hatred for the peace of your heart, keep moving. Think nothing of how you feel. Think of what the Word demands and stop at nothing to meet those demands. The heart owned by the Lord will agree with the spirit and not the flesh. Of course, the spirit will be at peace knowing the heart has been set on the way of Jesus.

If you can focus your energy on the peace of the spirit, perhaps you’ll find it overpowers the prickling discomfort of the flesh. That “perhaps” is large; if you find it, it will be a long while before.

Unfortunately, it seems we have to suffer the devil’s taunts and lies to learn the difference between his voice and God’s. Even the torment of lies, then, cannot separate the heart which continues to unrelentingly pursue God, from God Himself. Pursue Him no matter what you suffer at the taunting of the Enemy. God will make the way clear if you trust Him.

There are certainly times we seek Him and meet a mirage of His promises—those things for which we have prayed and have only seen mere glimpses. Take comfort, then, in Psalm 27:14. Wait. One way or another, the mirage will fade. An answer will come. But do not be stupid. Your spirit knows when you believe a lie – a “no” is not a “wait.” When you don’t know if you can follow your heart, follow your spirit. One day your heart’s first inclination will be the faithful inclination, but until then do the obvious right thing. Follow the spirit. The guidance of the Holy Spirit is the hard truth. These are truths you know and wouldn’t deny. God is love. God is merciful. God is on your side. Wait on those truths, meditating on what He would have you do. If your spirit is pricked, stop.

Listen.

Never move forward with a prickly spirit or you will learn exactly why you shouldn’t. You probably have already learned why. You know that going against God results in alienation from God. Acting against God can happen in small ways, though, and the mistaken Christian will easily see their mistake. Then, even if it is begrudgingly, they will get themselves back on the path of peace and follow God.

Those small mistakes are good; do not beat yourself up about them. They give you confidence to discern exactly who owns your heart. If God owns your heart and you follow the sound of His voice, there won’t be a mistake. There will be peace. Mistakes lead you into places you immediately want to leave. Your spirit cannot stand those places.

God, the owner of your heart, will lead you to places where your spirit bursts with expectancy for what God will do in that place. Your flesh may hate the situation and long for simpler comforts. Your spirit will keep the flesh quiet.

There is nothing more powerful within you than the expectant spirit waiting with faithful anticipation for the mirage to clear. The “illusory” promises of God become slightly more defined, stirring your spirits and drawing your heart ever closer to the outside of yourself, farther away from the flesh and nearer to the hand of God. When your heart beats with the shared anticipation of the spirit, you know you are free to trust God instantly the moment He whispers, “Follow me.”

When the process of discerning His voice is complete, trust Him. Follow the heart inside you. Follow the heart which is blind to the flesh and alive to the spirit. Your heart may not reach a place of fleshly death, as you are but human. Choose, then, to blind your heart’s eye to the selfish desires of the flesh, and look only to the spirit. Let the spirit take hold of your heart and it will lead you Home. 

Mini adventures.

Life isn't only made up of headlines, but the stories in between, which make the headlines stand out that much more. Pay attention to the stories you're living in between the headliner moments of your life. 

Psalm 19 (look it up)

Imlay City, MI 

& 

Lake Huron

(With a stop in between to see the windmills.)

May 7, 2015.

There was something oddly sacred about today, which was evident not only in the way God showed up for ME, but the way I heard He was showing up for those close to me, too. Makes me wonder what significance this day will hold when I look back on it from some time down the road when I have the added benefit of hindsight, which, as they say, is 20/20.

I decided on a whim this afternoon to take a drive north, as I usually only drive west and south, and sometimes east, but almost never north. A couple days ago I was driving through Detroit, and decided today called for quite the opposite kind of drive, and that's exactly what I got. I knew from past experience with the Thumb area that there is absolutely nothing there...at all...not even cell service, so it was no surprise to me when about twenty miles east of Sanilac, MI a notice popped up on my phone alerting me that the service had been dropped. It would not really have been a big deal except for the fact I was using my phone for its handy dandy GPS system. But, like I said, this was hardly surprising, considering everything north of Imlay City functions in a quasi-stone age state of living. 

Relying on my compass, the map app, and my own nose for directions, I continued on my way until I could see the hazy blue horizon of Lake Huron. The part of the lake where I stopped is interesting because it's smack dab in the middle of farm country, so if you look to your right you see a beautiful, sprawling, feels-like-heaven beach; and if you look to your left you see crops... 

Weird.

I found a place to park, grabbed my camera, and hopped out of my car. I would include pictures of the stone stairs leading down to the water, but I took those with my phone, and  I want to try to keep this blog as free of iPhone photos as possible. One post on iPhone photography is quite enough, but if I feel so inclined, perhaps I will include the photo I'm think of later. (Perhaps.)

I shivered along the shore for maybe 20 minutes, took pictures, thanked God for bringing there safely and providentially, as the entire decision was spontaneous and unplanned up until the moment I arrived at the lake. I walked into the water for a total of .0001 seconds, as it was much colder than I anticipated, and all the while wished I did more spontaneous things like this on a regular basis. I walked back up the stone stairs smelling like beach (a heavenly scent) and full of a sense of probably inflated adventure. I think the fact I drove by myself to someplace I'd never been before made me feel like I could take on the world, (especially because I figured it out sans Siri).

As I made my way back to my car, I looked out over the wooden fence separating the parking lot from the steep drop to the beach below, and knew I couldn't leave without spending time in prayer. When I was a teenager I loved praying at Lake Michigan on camping trips. I remembered how amazing those times always were and knew I needed to do it again right then. There were some picnic tables facing toward the beach, so I dropped my phone and camera in my car and meandered to one of the cleanest looking tables I could find. I sat, looked out at the water, and prayed for a long time about the uncertainties in my heart and the seemingly looming future I cannot quite figure out.

Rather ordinary birds swirled over my head a ways from where I sat, and God drew my attention to them. "Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?" The verses from Matthew chapter six replayed in my mind over and over again, and the comfort was tangible, real, and a sign of a promise I will not forget. At my college graduation last weekend, our keynote speaker admonished us to be still, to listen to God, and we would know what to do. 

Today, as I sat still above the shore of Lake Huron, listening to God, I felt peace. I felt assured. I felt a knowing sense that something was up. Something sacred was brewing--and still is! Along the drive to the lake, God pointed out three bronze bells to me, a symbol of faith He uses for me. A weapon against doubt. A reminder He is pleased with me. It was the sign I needed, the proof I'd been praying to see, and today, this most sacred of days, God began to turn the tide in my heart.

He is working. He is orchestrating. He is weaving strands of uncertainty together with ribbons of faith to create something truly remarkable. Something unique. Something only God could fashion out of humanity. When the rest of us try to perfect our humanity, we end up with sloppy seconds. That's why the only option we truly have is to hand our SELVES to Him. He is the only one who can make something out of nothing. Join me in handing my human nature to the one who designed my humanity in the first place. Let Him weave something beautiful, fashion something creative, orchestrate something immeasurable, and work on our behalf.

All He asks us to do in return is be still.

iPhone Photography

Sometimes, I just can't resist a good instagram photo. Downtown Grand Rapids never fails to provide photo opportunities, even if I fail to bring my DSLR. Here is a sample of my favorite iPhone shots.

Grand Rapids, MI. April 2015. 

Life in the time of Impending Graduation {Portrait/Documentary}

A collection of my friends and snippets of the moments I spent with them in the short months preceding our college graduation. Winter & Spring 2015. 

Models/subjects: 

Jenna Porter, Ashley Dixon, Bethany McMillin, & Natalie Schauer.

PROVIN TRAILS,  FEBRUARY  2015.

BABCOCK RESIDENCE HALL, JANUARY 2015

LANTERN COFFEE BAR, COMMERCE ST., JANUARY 2015

DOWNTOWN GRAND RAPIDS, COMMERCE ST., JANUARY 2015

MADCAP COFFEE, APRIL 2015

Ashley & Tyler {Engagement}

My roommate Ashley is getting married in July! Here are some highlights from our shoot this evening. 

April 12, 2015. Downtown Grand Rapids, MI.